Somewhere between the time I got up and got going, and now, I lost the impetus to get in my writing for today. And here I am, trying to keep to my new goal of intentional, spirited writing for 30 days. Not just writing to write, but writing with a purpose.
Which leads me back to thinking about how easy it is to procrastinate spending time reflecting on Godly things. Wasting away the day. I want to go to Scripture and find examples of Godly people who wasted away their time. Though I found 2 Corinthians 4:16, it wasn’t quite what I was thinking. Then I found myself reading Psalm 32. The image of three verses (Psalm 32:3-5) spoke of my silence before the Lord today. Yes, though maybe not intentionally, I did chose to put off conversation with Lord, instead choosing silence. Tada, here is verse 3-5:
When I kept silent,
my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
For day and night
your hand was heavy on me;
my strength was sapped
as in the heat of summer.
Then I acknowledged my sin to you
and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, “I will confess
my transgressions to the Lord.”
And you forgave
the guilt of my sin.
Though the day seemed to fly by, there was a groaning in my bones. A sense something was missing, though I chose not to slow down. And, knowing what was missing, I pressed on in silence until this time. Now that I find myself reading scripture, there is again energy and a renewed focus and joy which can only come from spending time in His Word. His living word.
“In him we live and move and have our being.” -Acts 17:28
“I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” – John 10:10
Sometimes I need to re-read those words with fresh eyes and ears. Times like today. My strength will never come from the amount of work I check off my “to do” list. No matter how good it feels to accomplish things, God is my true source of energy and shame on me for putting Him off today. Hmm, can I imagine how much more I would have accomplished if I had spent time with God at the beginning of the day? Better yet, imagine how my priorities would have been set right.
“That energy is God’s energy, an energy deep within you, God himself willing and working at what will give him the most pleasure.” – Philippians 2:13-23 (The Message)
Wow, now I am both excited and disappointed. The disappointment comes from looking back at not only today, but the many days where I have walked apart from God. Yet excited for the new hope that comes with tomorrow. Excited for the forgiveness the Lord offers, going back to Psalm 32:5, which also leads me to my knees and Luke 18:13 – “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’”
May we all take time to stop and acknowledge where our energy comes from. Give praise and thanks. Ask for forgiveness by confessing our sin.